How have you been? Is all as well as can be expected on the internet machine? What, with the copious amounts of porn and losers who do NOTING but play video games online all day…. You must be bored…But the stuff you see….Im sure you can’t burn that stuff out with an acid bath. You poor, sad, bastard.
So yesterday, went to Starbucks, as per usual, ordered a few things and began to swipe my bank card for the transaction. I picked up the key pad thingy majiggy and a tooth fell off of it. Let me say that again….A Tooth Fell Off Of IT…..let that short, random sentence sink in….I’ll wait…..are you there yet?
Now..Im sure allot of people would be disgusted and hell if it happened in the states, the patron would have sued Starbucks for emotional damages and made a million dollars, but not me Goog. I thought it was really sad. I saw it as such: a kid came in with their Mom and/or Dad, had probably lost the tooth earlier in the day and were playing with it in excitement of putting it under their pillow in hopes of becoming a few dollars richer the following morning…BUT now they have sadly left it behind and I am sure, after the realization of losing it, cried all day over the disappointment of losing one of their last few fleeting shreds of innocence. ……Or the tooth fairy, while buying a Venti Mocha could have dropped it in her rush…. A debate for the ages.
So…I’ve been in a funk for the past few weeks and just passed it off as depression/stir crazy/no more axes… But I think I put my finger on it. This Sunday, I will be turning 32. Now Goog, I know what you’re saying “But jerm, you handsome mother fucker…the 30’s are the new 20’s, your still in your prime and still have another 40 years to go” Well Goog, as your younger than me, Al Gore having invented you and global warming in the 80’s, I’ll not scoff at your youthful ignorance, wait…yes I will SCOFF SCOFF….ya fuckin fucktard.
Ya see, my problem isn’t getting older, it’s wasting the time I’ve had to use the lackluster talents that I have. Family and career aside…I’ve not published a book, I’ve not sold any art for renowned recognition, I’m not a famous tattoo artist, I have yet to learn to play guitar, and I sure as FUCK cannot figure out Sodoku ….
Now, I can blame it on my lack of drive and just being a lazy fucking slob, a sexy sexy lazy slob. I can take the onus of this all on myself, man up and take responsibility….But I choose to blame it on Whitey
lata Goog
Art Work By Patrick Byers,
Cover for our book
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